Frustration

If only I could feel confident after being defeated once more. If only I could live without self doubt. If only I wouldn't worry. If only I could just trust... even in the most difficult times. If only...

I don't want to live in "if only". I feel it is a defeatist mindset. I will be confident today, if not in my own abilities but because God chose me. God doesn't pick losers. They may start out that way but He seems to always turn them into winners. Gideon is a prime example. He was hiding in a wine press. That's right hiding. And God calls him a "mighty man of valor". Hmm... hiding in my book = scaredy-cat. But to God ... Well God saw something greater. He saw the mighty warrior that Gideon would be one day.

I will not doubt myself today because I belong to the King. My identity is found in his word. I am an "OVERWHELMING Conqueror in Christ Jesus"! Christ is the winner. He chose me and he chose me to be on the winning side. So whenever I feel like I'm losing, I just need to remember who's side I'm on. I'm winning! That's it. Final. Doesn't matter what I feel like. The battle is over. Today's battle is really not important in the grand scheme of things. The big battle is over.
It's kind of like in war. The opponents surrendered a week ago. Yet right now there is a small skirmish where you are living. You fight your opponents and you get frustrated because you start losing. But wait... the big war is already over. They don't realize that the big guy on their side already surrendered and lost. They didn't get the memo. Ooops! They are fighting for nothing. Your side already won. It doesn't mean you should quit the skirmish. It just means you keep going knowing who is the winner!

Finally, I don't need to worry and feel that this trial may whip me. I GOT THIS because God's got me! For when I doubt I am only calling my God small and powerless and I know he is anything but powerless. I mean who else has parted a sea for people to pass on dry ground? Just a thought for those who feel like wow "Can it get any harder"? My answer is Yeah, maybe. But I can trust my God. God is stronger, harder, tougher, braver, and enduring through all these trials. He will get me through this. You and I can trust that He is our rock and our strong tower. That means, if something is just to tough for us. All we have to do is go to God and lay it down at His feet. His grace will get you through the toughest of times. Oh yes He will! I can and will praise Him through the storms of life.

Let's start praising!

A New Look

So my blog has been focused on food mostly the past year as I tried out my skills in the kitchen with my new hubby. But for now, as I am not cooking much these days because I'm volunteering full time and taking online classes. I will share another type of creative endeavor. It's a poem titled:

Blue

Cars zoom by, outside the window
Some go fast and others lag slower
And I think I am watching a child’s tv show- (Mr. Rogers. Maybe…)
Where I saw little, fake cars move by slowly…
I am without worry
Nothing around me is anything but a story that I am creating.
I am painting my picture as I see the people through this window frame.
My lens is big and I make new discoveries each second.
A Texas Flag waves its hand at me in the wind.
The trees rustle overhead
As birds burst out from them like rockets from a ship.
Shooting out like darts into the blue sky.
They meet the clouds and do a dance before me.
They are very much alive.
The clouds show me they are alive too.
As they dodge the plane that wirs and whistles past.
The clouds know better than to stay in its path.
They scurry away.
And I am left looking at blue, blue, blue.
Miles, Miles, Miles.
Until I can’t see anymore.
I could drink that blue.